Category: Family

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Family

First day of summer

Today marks the first day of summer. Started humming the Brian Adams tune “Summer of 69”, which I recall was big during the summer of 1983. I was back in Pennsylvania. I had graduated from college and was getting ready for graduate school. I recall that was a hot summer for some reason. And here in New Mexico, today is hot (mid-80’s) and windy. Low humidity, and blue sky. Yes, I was able to get back about midnight after the travel day from hell.

It was good that I was able to get home because I had lots of things to do. I had to feed the horse first thing in the morning, go to work on my day off to deal with some pressing things, pick up the dog from the kennel, take daughter riding and pick up son from nature camp. Horse and dog are fine, children are well, and I didn’t get sucked in on my day off.

Summertime usually coincides with the kickoff of the afternoon monsoon season. Monsoon season has been on again, off again over the past two decades. Monsoon season is usually when the rain clouds form above the mountains to the west during the day. By the afternoon, we have a thunderstorm with rain. They typically hit every afternoon and last about a half an hour at most. But the thunder and lightening can be quite impressive. They add their own unique set of colors to the New Mexico sky, which is a palette containing a variety of colors. The skies are often light blue or dark blue. They are some of the deepest blues that I have ever seen. And of course, the white puffy clouds. Often with the monsoons are large and very colorful rainbows. Sadly, I have yet to find a pot of gold. Another sky anomaly, depending upon the sunlight, the angle in the sky, and other weather conditions are the variety of other colors present in the sky: yellow, orange, red, and pink. These colors are often present at sunrise and sunset.

We have a quiet weekend planned. Daughter plans to work at Goose Downs. Son has nothing on the horizon but we have some work to do at the stables in terms of cutting weeds and getting the barn ready for the first delivery of hay shortly. Aside from housecleaning, perhaps I can read some more of my book.

Quiet is good. I never sleep well on travel, so I often return very tired and need the weekend to recover. Plans for July and August are starting to take shape. Two horse competitions; one in July and one in August. My 40th high school reunion is in a July. Still trying to decide if I will make it back. Sounds like a few folks that I haven’t seen in 40 years may be there. July is pretty busy already, making a long weekend trip back east difficult, but we shall see.

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Family

Happy Fathers Day

Happy Fathers Day to all of the dads out there. It was a very quiet day around here. Son was here and daughter had a horse riding competition. Daughter did well. This was her first time riding two different horses in two different categories. She took first in both. Conversely, son stayed here inside, playing some computer games. Not sure if he took first or what game he played. Whatever he played, it kept him busy all afternoon. That was good because I really wasn’t feeling well.

Just as we do on Mothers Day, the kids had cards for me. They usually have something like “from your favorite son, or your best daughter” written somewhere on either the envelope or inside the card. Some years they make them. This year, like most, they are store bought cards. Nothing fancy. No singing cat or dog. It’s the thought that counts.

The act of giving cards is another activity that I find missing in today’s technology driven world. A hand written note conveys far more emotion than an electronic card, e-mail or text. The fact that time was taken to actually get a card, to sit down and write something, anything, makes it a message from the heart.

I, as many of my friends on Facebook, posted images of their kids or themselves with their dads today. I did the same. My photo had son and daughter together, outside the stables with the horse. I take a great many pictures of myself with the kids, or the kids by themselves or together. These are my pictures of our family. Conversely, I don’t have photos of myself, or my sister, or the two of us with our father. Let’s just say that my father and I were estranged over these past 40-plus years, even up to his passing a few years ago. That action was the product of family divorce, and I definitely do not want to make the same mistakes as he did. It’s tough, sometimes I don’t get it right, but I keep trying.

Until tomorrow.

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Family

Dogs

Since I have had to set up my own household, the kids and I have adopted two dogs. Both animals were from our local county animal shelter. The first was Abby (photo on the right). The second and most recent is Jewel (photo on the left).

They are part of our family.

Abby was a long hair mixed bread who was an older dog. The adoption papers suggested that she was perhaps 10 years old, and came to our local shelter after living in the Taos area. Set in her ways, she would always great me at the door when I came home, often sitting there looking outside through a window that was floor height.

She immediately fit into the family, but was not the kind of dog who liked to wrestle with son. Even though he picked her out of all of the dogs at the pound, she was my dog. When she wanted something, it was me that she would always visit. Short walks were fine, but she certainly would let you know when it was time to go home. I think that is a trait that she learned from my kids. We had Abby for a little over two years before she passed away from a seizure. We have a lock of her hair, a paw print and her cremated remains in a picture box in the dining room of the house.

At her passing, I wrote a little poem. It went like this:

Rest In Peace my four-legged friend.
Our time together, albeit brief, has come to an end.
I rescued you from the pound,
You rescued me from being lost.
Together our love and friendship grew.
I already miss your wagging tail, and your growls of joy when you roll on my pile of dirty clothes.
Your barking when you would greet me at the door, 
was evermore poetic with the kids in tow.
My loss of joy makes this pain so acute.
It will exhaust me with each passing day I am sure,
But in the end, we will meet once again.

Some months passed before we got another dog. Her name is Jewel. A pit bull terrier, she equally had a troubled life. Abused and injured before she was two years old, I can only describe her as a very lovable ball of pure energy. Just looking at her chasing her tail wears me out.

She also likes to look out the window next to the door. And she loves long walks that allow me to really get a workout. She also is my dog even though the kids picked her at the pound.

In my life, I have only had four other dogsthat I called part of my family. They had less interesting names: Tinkle, Tippy, Buffy and Dash. Dash was the family dog after I got married. She was the dog who was around when the kids were born. A golden retriever, Dash was a great dog. The other dogs are from my childhood years growing up in Pennsylvania.

Dogs are just great. They are family.
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Family

Pony Club

If you spend time with horses, you eventually get introduced to the United States Pony Club. They aim to teach young and old riders the proper rules for taking care of a horse, as well as riding and eventing.

In preparation for my daughter’s next event, she has a mounted pony club meeting today. The have regional and location-specific clubs throughout the country. My daughter rides as a member of the Santa Fe Pony Club, which is one of the clubs in the Southwest Region.

So I dutifully took her to the place where they ride, which is south of Santa Fe. Santa Fe has several places in the area that offer riding and host events, including polo. Just past Lamy, on the way to Galisteo is Goose Downs Farm. This is the place where my daughter rides and trains often.

They offer training for dressage, show jumping and cross country for all ages. Indoor and outdoor. As you know, the weather in New Mexico is nice for most of the year. Today was sunny and low 70’s. I just love the blue sky. You can rent a horse or bring your own. Today my daughter road Wyatt, which is not her horse. We will transport Ruby down later in the week. I like to tell Ruby that she is going to the spa for the week.

Sadly, she was ill prepared for the mounted lesson today because she forgot her equipment, but practiced the dressage course for her ranking in preparation for next week.

Goose Downs has a riding event coming up next weekend (http://www.goosedownsfarm.com). You can board your horse there for a fee, and they even have a bunkhouse where you can stay if your coming from afar.

So while she practiced today, I helped groom the place in preparation for the dressage events this weekend. Thus I managed to get several miles in while pushing the mower.

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Family

Subject

As I sit here in the living room this evening, I am trying to figure out what to write. Usually, there are several subjects during the day that pop into my head. Some cause me to think longer and harder than others. It’s the one that I ponder the most that writes itself. That is the one that becomes the subject matter that I write about in the evening. I was setting here this evening, alternating between the TV, my beer and things on my iPad. Lots going on today so there are many topics to write about.

Then my solitude is interrupted by the kids. That quickly escalates into an argument about ice cream sundaes. Something that is a special treat has now become an everyday treat in the mind of my son. So as the sucker that I am, I run out and get them. Daughter has a friend from school over for a sleepover. Right now I am actually quite angry at both of them for different reasons.

Upon my return, son knows he is in the doghouse but he just cannot comprehend why and his typical response is “I’m sorry”. However, as I try to explain to him again, he has never comprehended the concept of an apology and that with it comes the idea that he will not do that which he is apologizing for again. Literally it can be a matter of minutes and he is back at it. We have this conversation over and over and over. He just does not comprehend the idea.

Disclaimer. Both of my kids have been diagnosed and are taking medicine for ADHD. They are not in the zombie state that one often thinks of with ADHD medicines. Just the opposite. And to those who suggest that it is overdiagnosed, and the medicines are over prescribed. There is a clear difference between both of them with and without the medicine. Over the years we have tried everything. The symptoms in a boy can and are often very different in a girl.

I often wonder if it is me. Like me, both have anger issues. I’ve tried over the years to work on it, and have been somewhat successful, especially around the kids. Not perfect but getting better as they get older. Sometimes my actions remind me of my life in growing up. Then I wonder if it’s a product of the divorce. As I am the product of divorce, I do my best to be there, treat them equal, and try to talk to them every day. Conversation was never a big thing in my household.

They are very different. Daughter is outgoing, has her horse, lots of friends, tries new and different things. She is on her own journey. Son has a hampster. He is a lot like me in many ways. He keeps to himself. Somewhat shy, an introvert. Has a couple of friends, but with school out he doesn’t keep in touch or try to play with them over the summer vacation. Doesn’t excel in sports; actually has no interest in sports. He is the one I most worry about. Hopefully next week will be better because he starts a summer camp and his tow closest friends from preschool will be there. Hope that goes well.

Today was a beautiful day outside. Both spent the day inside. We went out and I got them new bikes for the summer. Their older bikes were too small for them. Bring them home and nothing. Put them in the garage. They did not go for a ride. Ditto with daughter and the horse. No riding today. It’s clear, and although he doesn’t say so, I think he feels slighted by the horse. It’s a big expense and so he sees things. One can by lots of game coins or things for playing online video games for the cost of some horse things. We tried to get him interested in horses. No. We talked about chickens, rabbits, or goats. Initially displays some interest, but like most things, he will loose interest and then it becomes my responsibility. In general, I’m not one to force things upon either of them. It never turns out well in the end.

And just like that. I am done with this evening writing assignment. I covered the five or six topics that went through my mind during the day. Might be long winded rambling, but there it is.

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Family

Summer Break

This week starts the summer break for the kids, about three months off from school. For daughter, the time will be spent riding. What hasn’t been worked out yet is whether she spends the weeks here at the stables riding her horse, or splitting the week riding here and several days at the stables south of Santa Fe, where she gets her training. The great thing about the latter is that she gets to work with many different horses.

There are other advantages for splitting the week. She gets some professional training with people watching and coaching. This is something that she doesn’t get riding at the stables closer to home.

For son, his summer will be spent at several camps. The majority of the summer weeks will be spent at art classes. Interspersed between the art camps are camps for hiking and outdoors, and a two week robotics class. The hiking explores the landscape around where we live and the forces that shaped the local mountains, getting wet and dirty. The second week explores the creatures that live in the dirt, the water and the mountains.

Then there is robotics. There they will learn how to build, program and control basic robots. We thought this would be great since he likes computer games. Reading up on the subject, it looks like they use LEGO

kits. Hopefully this will allow him to learn basics, to be creative, and to have fun.

Anyway, this summer should be fun, busy and keep them outside.

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Family

Ruby

When the kids were younger, we would often go to the local stables and slowly drive the roads and look at the animals. Chickens, goats, a couple of cows, a llama and some turkeys. The main residents at the stables are horses. All different sizes and colors. A coworker of mine had a stable and several horses and on one of our trips, he and his wife were there. We stopped. Big mistake. Shortly thereafter, daughter was sitting on the back of a horse. A big grin across her face, she was immediately hooked. At that time she was three.

Eleven years have passed, as has several loaner horses, two rented horses, the local US Pony Club horse. Today she has a horse, a stable, and rides regularly and in competitions. Her horse is named Ruby, and she has become another family pet, much like the dog.

Here she is, greeting us for her evening feeding. She gets fed twice a day, and depending upon daughter, ridden every day. Daily practices are often in preparation for dressage, show jumping and cross country. My daughter competes in all three at the beginner novice level.

She enjoys it. It keeps her and her friends out of trouble. Yet, when I see her with Ruby, she still has that big grin across her face.

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Family

Terrarium

Picked my son up from school this past Friday. In his hands were parts of a school science project. A plastic cup with green water, a snail, two fish and some grass. He was excited, as was I. More animals to add to the menagerie that live at my place. In addition to these new creatures we have the hampster, gold fish, one silver dollar fish, a dog, and of course a horse. The animals come and go. Over the past five years of setting up our second home, we have had an older dog, many aquarium fish, lizards, hamsters, birds, and guinea pigs. The guinea pigs were rescued from their daycare. Of course, we have talked about goats to keep the horse company at the stables, rabbits, snakes, huskies, and cats. No cats because we think daughter is allergic to them.

The terrarium fish and snail have been transplanted into a more permanent home: the brandy sniffer. The dog has migrated from the cage to the floor to the sofa. Just another member of the family. The aquarium sits in the corner of the living room, noisy because of the constant running of the filter.

Not sure of what Sunday has in store for us. Daughter has another riding lesson so there will be a morning car trip. I have things to do around the house, and the stable, and hopefully find some time to read. Son will play games on his iPad, invite me to enter our Minecraft world, and then quickly move on to some other games. Enjoy your weekend.

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Family

The Journey Begins

Site under construction. I decided that I needed a hobby. So I am new at this. More to follow. Stay tuned and come back often.

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

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